She knew that she would be okay....

I seem to only come here when I'm feeling really down.  And today is definitely one of those days.

I'm really lonely.  I miss my son.  I miss my boyfriend.  I miss my best friend.  I miss my job.  I miss everything today.

I'm so...  alone right now.  And I fucking hate it.  I don't like being alone.  Everyone says that I need to get used to it...  I know.  I know I should learn to like being with myself.  But I don't see that ever happening.

I don't even know how to describe how I'm feeling right now.  I want to say depressed?  But it's not depression.  I've been there...  This is not depression.

I just wish I knew what it was.